Should I continue?

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Re: Should I continue?

Postby greenyrst » Thu Sep 28, 2017 11:34 pm

Another year on and still obsessed with this fetish. I've tried to stop but realised it's pointless. Sooner or later my body will make me stop!
I've managed to not increase the risk of the stunts, but recently thoughts of doing slightly bigger ones have crept in.
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Re: Should I continue?

Postby Gloved Imperator XIX » Mon Oct 30, 2017 10:09 am

Greenyrst:

First of all: Wow. And that's not meant as a disparaging or judgmental "Wow", but a truly: "I'm legitimately dumbstruck" sort of wow. Let me secondly say, "I didn't think this fetish really existed."

Now, you may be asking of yourself, "But Imperator, what do you mean, 'really existed?'"

Ladies and gentlemen, I give you the movie "Crash", (no, not the famous one) by my second favorite director of all time, David Cronenberg. And that's the second reason I'm saying "Wow" here, because it means that you, Greenyrst, are probably not alone, at least not in such a way where at least the directorial master David Cronenberg wasn't inspired by the idea, by, likely, SOMEONE -- quite possibly someone like you.

...

Let me preface the rest of my post here by saying this:

I'm NOT IN ANY WAY trying to glamorize your fetish, Greenyrst. It is dangerous as fuck. It could kill you. It might kill you.

I don't know how many people have it, nor how many people have died because of it. I did a cursory Google search for symphorophilia (the technical, psychological name for your fetish -- I'll get to that in a bit) forums and was...well, honestly dismayed (due to the implications that there are so few with symphorophila, or that so few live long enough to establish a forum), but not surprised, to not find a single one. Not one. But, as you will go on to read here, you are, at least, historically speaking, not alone in this. THIS FETISH EXISTS. I hope that makes it more real for you.

...

Let me also issue this warning: I AM NOT A MEDICAL NOR MENTAL HEALTH PROFESSIONAL. I worked in the mental health field for five years. But...

As I'm no therapist or mental health professional, nothing I post here is meant to be construed as medical or mental health advice or the substitute for medical or mental health advice from a clinically licensed professional. At all. Bar none. Full stop. End of story. The end. Fin. Ta-da.

...

Anyway, having said all that, what is the tagline for David Cronenberg's "Crash"? "Sex and car crashes." I'm not fucking joking.

And note, Greenyrst, by sharing this, what is probably one of my top three favorite Cronenberg films of all time (Crash, Videodrome, and eXistenZ, in no order), isn't meant to downplay or make light of/fun of you or your fetish, or of just how fucking dangerous it is. It's to show that someone MADE A MOVIE out of the subject. And it's not even a porno! But, it is rated NC-17. Yeah, like that's an issue here. Pfft.

As an aside: Why couldn't David Cronenberg make a glove fetish picture? Fuck, I mean, there are probably some great glove fetish porn films out there, but this is David Motherfucking "Shivers, Rabid, Scanners, Videodrome, The Dead Zone, The Fly, Naked Lunch" Cronenberg. He's my favorite director of all time ONLY BESIDE David Lynch! (*I guess I have a thing for creative guys named 'David'. :hmm: I'll file that away.) So...yeah. Does anyone have connections to Hollywood and think we can talk ole' Mr. Cronenberg into directing a glove fetish film? :mrgreen:

Anyway, after having gotten all of that out of the way, here are the two main trailers for David Cronenberg's film, "Crash":

(*As a brief aside: I still can't get YouTube videos to display right using the 'youtube=' tags. I click the embed button, insert the video ID, hit preview, and see this: [youtube=] vZTYkmAcsvk[/youtube] (without the space after the ']', which itself is after the '='. Any advice or pointers would be appreciated. Thanks in advance.)

Trailer #1: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vZTYkmAcsvk

Trailer #2: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sNi80K5sTco

The full movie is on YouTube, if anyone's interested. And though I don't personally give two shits about me or anyone else downloading ("pirating") anything for their own personal use, I don't link to or distribute full licensed works online, at least not in a public capacity, like on here, as a matter of principal. Yep, I'm a leech. Sorry, seeders. I'm your worst nightmare!

But, you can search "crash 1996 full" and you should see "Crash 1996 hot full". That's the full movie, in a pretty good quality, I might add (I own the film) in English, despite the video description being in Spanish.

More about it, and Greenyrst, about your fetish, possibly, by proxy, I think, can be found here:

Crash -- The 1996 David Cronenberg film's Wikipedia page: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Crash_(1996_film)

Crash -- The 1973 J. G. Ballard novel, which the Cronenberg film is based on: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Crash_(J._G._Ballard_novel)

Here is the Wikipedia page for 'Symphorophilia', a paraphilia (the fancy pants psychology term for fetish. I have a background in psychology, funnily enough. Don't worry, Greenyrs, I'm not analyzing you. I find this fascinating, personally, and in a genuine way, not in some 'psychological case study' sort of way), which is a fetishization of: "staging and watching a tragedy, such as a fire or a traffic accident", according to Wikipedia:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Symphorophilia

...

So, anyway, Greenyrst, now that I've shared that movie with you, let me say:

I can't condone what you do. BUT...neither will I condemn it.

Why? Because It's YOUR fetish. You know it can kill you. I won't die if you crash just so, despite having all the best intentions in the world, and wrap yourself around your bike. Thus, by continuing to practice it, you continue to sign up for possibly making the ultimate sacrifice in seeking the ultimate pleasure. *Shrug* So, you'll get no judgments from me. This is a solid, "Them's the breaks" sort of deal and that's that.

...

However, having said that, I will close this post with a caveat, and I hope you take it seriously and think about what I say at the end of this post before you think about crashing on purpose next time.

But, I won't plead with you. What you do with your life, and as a result, your possible death, is YOUR. CHOICE.

Additionally, I'm making this post with the hope that it can maybe help you learn a little something about yourself. And though I'm not saying that anything I type here applies to you specifically, this is the best I can do with the tools at my disposal. So, take it however you will.

...

Anyway, though I myself don't practice any death-related fetishes, I "understand" (I hate using that word in cases like this, because I don't really 'understand' them, or especially the specific circumstances of the people that practice them, or their reasons for doing so), at least from what limited capacity I have at my disposal.

One of my favorite actors ever, my childhood legend, David Carradine, from the TV series "Kung Fu" and "Kung Fu: The Legend Continues", son of acting 'even-bigger-legend' John Carradine, probably died practicing autoerotic asphyxiation:

http://abcnews.go.com/Entertainment/story?id=7763422

My best friend has a more theoretical death fetish. He likes the idea of being smothered to death. That's all I'll say without his permission. In his case, he doesn't actually practice smothering to the point of asphyxiation, but will start, and then finish mentally, through visualization.

So, to a small, small, small iota of a degree: I get it. I do. Walking the razor's edge between life and death is, for many, the ultimate rush. I can't speak for you, Greenyrst, obviously. So, I won't.

So, yeah: As rare and...I can't emphasize this enough...FUCKING DANGEROUS as your fetish is, Greenyrst -- and let me say, once more, for (probably unnecessary) clarity:

It could kill you, and it might kill you. BUT...

You're not the only one with...or that has had, past-tense...your fetish.

Anyway, here is one psychologist's PERSONAL (emphasis on personal, for obvious reasons, since it's one man's views) musings about symphorophilia:

https://drmarkgriffiths.wordpress.com/2012/10/08/crash-and-turn-on-a-brief-look-at-chremastistophilia-and-symphorophilia/

I hit 'ABOUT DR MARK GRIFFITHS' (Snide comment about blog owner 1: WHY IS THAT IN ALL CAPS WITH NO PUNCTUATION MARKS MARK), and was pleasantly surprised to find the blog owner is (or at least pretends to be online) a doctor of psychology (a PhD as opposed to a PsyD), named Professor MARK GRIFFITHS, BSc, PhD, CPsychol, PGDipHE, FBPsS, FRSA. (Snide comment about blog owner 2: DO YOU ALWAYS WRITE YOU NAME IN CAPS MARK)

Oo! Father Mark Spitz III even has a Wikipedia page! https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mark_D._Griffiths Pfft. He probably wrote it himself. (Ha ha. Sorry. I like ribbing on mental health professionals for a reason I'm about to reveal...now:)

Um...as a veteran (Of the psychic wars? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jGKNaIXtBZQ -- Sorry... This was a natural plug for what is a tremendous Blue Öyster Cult song. The song was co-written by English author and legend, Michael Moorcock, creator of the "Elric of Melniboné" mythos, so yeah...fucking hell, that's epic.) ...And now I've gone and lost my place.

Um...so, yeah, as a veteran of the field...THAT'S A FUCKING LOT OF CREDENTIALS!! That's a literal word salad! Fuck me. So, if you'll bear with me for a moment:

Oo! Look at me! I have titles, too! I'm special! I am now:

Detective Sir Honorable Reverend Father Brother Nephew Cousin Former Roommate Viscount Doctor Professor Master Gunnery Sergeant His Holiness The Hardest Working Man In Showbusiness Gloved Imperator XIX, Esquire, MS, P.I.

Sorry. But, you get FUCKING SICK of having to write all those goddamned titles on EVERY. SINGLE. CLINICAL. DOCUMENT. when people like our good Dr. Professor Peter Griffin up there are involved with a case file. It gets old FAST. But, he probably knows his shit, is what I'm trying to say.

But again, Greenyrst, it's the opinion of ONE MAN. An educated man, sure, but one man, no less.

...

It's time for that caveat:

Though I won't judge you, Greenyrst, as a fellow human being, I want you to live. I think your fetish is extremely risky, to say the least, and even though I don't know you, you're a fellow glove fetishist, or so I assume, as you're here. As such, by proxy, you're like a sibling to me, as corny as that may sound. As such, despite not knowing you, it would hurt to one day find a topic on here saying something along the lines of, "We are sorry to post that Greenyrst passed away at 8:32 PM/20:32 on XX/XX/XX" or just have you disappear.

Note: AGAIN...I'm not saying you HAVE to stop, or pleading for you to do so, but please...

At least consider talking to a psychologist. Not in some, "Oh, Greenyrst is mentally ill!" sort of way, but in a, "I think it could help you get to learn more about and hopefully understand more about yourself" sort of way.

I only made this post as detailed as I did, because, as I said, I have a background in the field.

...But I was only a grunt, relatively speaking. I'm not nor was I ever a psychologist. I can't, nor will I going forward, help you in any formal or semi-formal capacity. Besides, I'm basically retired (at under-40! LOL). I can offer moral support here, but I am not a mental health professional. I think you should at least talk to a psychologist, not because I think something's wrong with you, or that you're broken, or something so judgmental as that. But, it's because: I want you to live.

I think Styx says it best in my favorite song off their album "Cyclorama", called 'These Are The Times':

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=llnlvYhojzg

Lyrics:
https://genius.com/Styx-these-are-the-times-lyrics

A pertinent sample:
I know these are the times we find out who we really are
This will be when a true friend stands at your side
One more like me who wants to believe
In the truth of all we experienced
To live again, to jump back into the fight
Someone like me who wants you to live


Otherwise, as another song from the same album (with Jack Black and Kyle Gass from Tenacious D on backing vocals, as can be heard here: https://youtu.be/ndXrnpmSf4w?t=3m3s) ways, you could...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CgAZglc-iMk

...'Kiss Your Ass Goodbye'.

Lyrics:
https://genius.com/Styx-kiss-your-ass-goodbye-lyrics

A pertinent sample:
Boy you're out of time
You didn't choose life
It's just your luck
You got your turn now
Give it up and
Kiss your ass good-bye
What's left to say
When it's over everyone but you remains
Little children will
Still go out and play
Just like it's any other sunny day
Oh yeah


Once again, I'm not trying to make light of your fetish or you or your situation, nor am I trying to plead with you to stop crashing. It's you're life, but the above two songs, from the same album, by Styx, of all bands, pretty much summarize your options, as I see them, going forward. The choice of which path you take is yours.

Under normal circumstances like this, I'd say, "You have time to figure this out." But I'll be blunt. You may not. Your next crash could be your last. Again, though it's not for me to say that you need to stop, I will ask: Is having that knowledge in the back of your mind worthwhile?

(I'm just doing some clean-up of details that may be traced back to me offline, as a new measure to be safer online. Also: As a hindsight sort of thing: This turned out to be WAY overkill! LOL! I know my heart was in the right place, but damn...my head wasn't. I'm glad it didn't end in offense, though. But, yeah...I was kinda preachy. I won't apologize again, but still...)
Last edited by Gloved Imperator XIX on Sat Dec 02, 2017 5:15 am, edited 4 times in total.
I have two passions in life: Gloves are a CLOSE third.
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Re: Should I continue?

Postby greenyrst » Sun Nov 05, 2017 11:09 am

Thanks for your reply, I'll be honest and say some of what you posted went straight over my head.
I was aware of it being called symphorophilia.

Yes I'm aware that this fetish COULD kill me! But in all likelihood, given the levels of protection I use and the limits I put upon myself with regards the size of crashes I perform it's unlikely to cause my demise.

I have tried finding mental health professionals to talk to but have been unable to get a response with regards this fetish. Maybe one day I'll try harder.

I believe I've seen the movie you talk about but will look it up soon and watch it or re-watch it.

In closing,
YES I'm aware of the risks I take.
YES I'm as protected as possible.
YES I'm going to continue with this fetish (for now)
MAYBE it will cause my death but I doubt it.
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Re: Should I continue?

Postby Gloved Imperator XIX » Sun Nov 05, 2017 4:26 pm

greenyrst wrote:Thanks for your reply, I'll be honest and say some of what you posted went straight over my head.
I was aware of it being called symphorophilia.

Yes I'm aware that this fetish COULD kill me! But in all likelihood, given the levels of protection I use and the limits I put upon myself with regards the size of crashes I perform it's unlikely to cause my demise.

I have tried finding mental health professionals to talk to but have been unable to get a response with regards this fetish. Maybe one day I'll try harder.

I believe I've seen the movie you talk about but will look it up soon and watch it or re-watch it.

In closing,
YES I'm aware of the risks I take.
YES I'm as protected as possible.
YES I'm going to continue with this fetish (for now)
MAYBE it will cause my death but I doubt it.

Cool. That's actually very encouraging to read, and I will legitimately feel better about how you practice your fetish because of your reply. I mean, I wasn't losing sleep with worry or anything (I hope that doesn't sound as crass as I think it does), but I'd occasionally wonder about you, you know? Because I had no idea just what the scale of the crashes you'd been practicing had evolved to. I only read the first couple pages of your posts, and the last.

So, I mean, again, while I can't condone...well, anything...your fetish or anyone else's, especially if they're particularly risky, because they're not my fetishes (which seem so mundane, frankly, compared to some, like yours)...you won't get any condemnation or judgment out of me. But, it does genuinely ease my mind to know that you're not, like, tearing down a 60-degree incline at 200 mph/322 kph straight into a retaining wall. So, I mean, you're at least being...well, somewhat safe about this whole thing.

I have to say, though, again, I'm not trying to glamorize your fetish, I do love the look and aesthetic of your safety gear, though. That shit is FUCKING LEGIT!! It looks like you race in the Isle of Man TT! "Yeah, it's no big, I'm just a fucking professional motorcyclist in my spare time!" I don't know where you're from, Greenyrst, but at least here, that I've seen, at least, the USA, NO motorcyclist, at least hobbyist, wears anything remotely to that level, at least on the streets. It's usually balding, middle-aged fat men in, like, jeans, a t-shirt, and a leather vest, or something, on a Harley Davidson. You look like a consummate professional. But again, don't take this as a glamorization or whatever: I just think you look cool decked out in your gear, basically. :biggrin:

It's probably a knee-jerk reflex, but sometimes I do worry about people with fetishes like yours, not merely in your case (I won't worry anymore), but because I've ran into similar cases before, where people with more extreme physical, adrenaline-fueled fetishes, actaully become addicts to them, and spiral out of control. Thankfully, that doesn't necessarily seem to be the case here, but then, I only know you based on what I've read in your posts.

Reading your reply here... And thank you SO MUCH for taking the time to read my (way too clinical and over-dramatic, probably) post and taking the additional time to reply, by the way... you actually sound at least semi-level headed as a person (I only say "semi" because I don't know you outside of you posts here, Greenyrst) as a whole.

I can say this for sure, though: Even though this is our first "personal" interaction on here, I feel like I've gotten a better snapshot of you as a whole, and you seem like a generally rational person, and totally awesome otherwise. :-) I'm glad you're a member of the community here.

By the way, sorry to derail your own topic:
But what are your favorite kinds of gloves, Greenyrst? I'm genuinely curious now! If you don't mind taking a minute to share (and you don't have to, believe me -- I don't want to force information out of anyone), I'd like to hear...or read, rather, I suppose.

So, again, while I can't in good conscience approve of your fetish, I can at least feel better about how you practice it. This is clearly something you take very seriously, and have worked up to in stages. I mean, your post history goes back to fucking 2013, so...again, while I can't outright give you my seal of approval...that's over 4 years, and you're still here. So, you do you. Just be safe. I did legitimately worry there when I wrote my post, but only because I didn't know how big your crashes were. Now that I have a better idea, I can rest easier.

Thank you for that, Greenyrst, and thank you for making this topic, because not only have learned a lot about your fetish, and you as a person, but not to be so quick to dive into clinical panic mode. I should have asked some more questions of you first, before doing so.

I'm tremendously sorry if I offended you in any way. That was not at all my intent. It was also, like, 5 in the morning here when I started writing my post; that's not meant to be an excuse, just context. So, thank you, Greenyrst. I'm glad to have had a chance to meet, and what's more, actually interact with, you on here. You seem like a wonderful person.

P.S. -- There is a reason that David Cronenberg's "Crash" is one of my top three favorite films of his: It turns me on! Because, it's a genuinely sexy movie.

And, as a bonus, there's a scene where the main actress is wearing fucking hot short leather gloves in a car with the main actor, and he even references them directly in conversation, saying something along the lines of how she should be careful not to tear them on, if I recall, the jagged metal of the wrecked car. It's like, "Mr. Cronenberg -- are you tempting me?"

It's also legitimately one of his best films, in terms of how it's directed, filmed, scripted, scored, and everything, and it's probably more accessible than, say, Videodrome or eXistenZ, which though are fantastic films in their own regard, are a lot more...well, fucking bizarre...than Crash. I hope you watch it and enjoy it, whether you've seen it already or not. I'll actually watch it again today, myself. :mrgreen:

(As another hindsight thing: Um...I apparently lack reading comprehension! LOL! I realize now Greenyrst meant a bicycle. So many Americans call motorcycles 'bikes' I got confused...and I was busy being kinda pompous. LOL! I joke, because, as I said, I meant well, but it just kinda went overboard.)
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