Should I continue?
Posted: Mon Jun 24, 2013 5:53 am
I have a very dangerous fetish and don't know if I should continue with it?
I love to get kitted out in lot's of motorcycle protective clothing and perform stunts / crashes!!
I have a specific and well planned list of gear I wear or should wear to protect myself. Groin protector (not purchased yet), padded shorts, full body armour with padding on spine, shoulders, chest, arms and elbows , full motorcycle leathers, Motocross boots (not yet purchased), gum shield, full face motorcycle helmet with visor, wrist guards, motorcycle padded and armoured gloves (not yet purchased) and neck brace (not yet purchased).
I put on all of the gear, to then crash on purpose, for fun (only involves myself in secluded spots, not on highways) I have had to substitute mx boots for steel toed boots and gloves have been 2 pairs of industrial gloves 1st leather and 2nd thick rubber over the leather ones. Before I actually crashed I built up slowly. I started out by running and then sliding along on the ground like someone might do to reach a base in base ball, only I did it on tarmac and concrete. Then when I was I bit more confident I took to a bike (only a push bike so far) my goal is to get up to speed (say 25mph) take off from a ramp say a couple of feet high and land on the front wheel being thrown over the bars and landing on my face , chest and knees. I'm a way off this yet!! so far I have rode fast and the jumped off causing me to tumble landing on my knee and continuing over onto my arm shoulder and finally my head. I started slowly and each time I have built up more speed as my faith in the gear built. I have also pulled a wheelie and fell backwards on purpose landing on my back, bum, elbows and head.
The gear has done it's job well with the armour and padding doing it's job in protecting me. I have only been slightly hurt twice 1st time was actually from faulty body armour which has been sorted now and the second time was the last time I went out, about 5 months ago. As I have said I have substituted mx boots for what I have, steel toed boots using 3 layers of thick socks for extra padding. I was always worried that my ankles were vunerable and I was right, luckily they only got bruised and not broken. I have promised myself I wont go out again until I can afford proper boots, gloves and a neck brace. I really want some protection for my groin too!!!! if I ever pluck up the courage to go over the bars I will get hard chest protector to go over leathers too.
My fiancée knows about this fetish and is not very keen (understandably) she came out with me the 1st time I went out on a bike but didn't get out of the car. I have been out a couple of times since without her and I am scared to death incase I get hurt and I can't get help when i'm alone. I wish I could forget about this fetish but I can't. the buzz I get off using the protection for it's intended use really turns me on.
I am not trying to get hurt, I want to feel protected doing something that WITHOUT the gear would almost certainly result in serious injury. The feelings I get when i'm in the gear are intense but when i'm on the bike ready to go it is an equal mix of fear and excitement. I close my visor set off and it's almost a point of no return. then when i'm as fast as I can get and I jump off, it is a point of no return. I have total belief in the protection, I selected it and I know it's designed for far greater speeds if you need it!! the only difference is for me it's there because I DO need it and I DO need it to work.
Should I continue?
I love to get kitted out in lot's of motorcycle protective clothing and perform stunts / crashes!!
I have a specific and well planned list of gear I wear or should wear to protect myself. Groin protector (not purchased yet), padded shorts, full body armour with padding on spine, shoulders, chest, arms and elbows , full motorcycle leathers, Motocross boots (not yet purchased), gum shield, full face motorcycle helmet with visor, wrist guards, motorcycle padded and armoured gloves (not yet purchased) and neck brace (not yet purchased).
I put on all of the gear, to then crash on purpose, for fun (only involves myself in secluded spots, not on highways) I have had to substitute mx boots for steel toed boots and gloves have been 2 pairs of industrial gloves 1st leather and 2nd thick rubber over the leather ones. Before I actually crashed I built up slowly. I started out by running and then sliding along on the ground like someone might do to reach a base in base ball, only I did it on tarmac and concrete. Then when I was I bit more confident I took to a bike (only a push bike so far) my goal is to get up to speed (say 25mph) take off from a ramp say a couple of feet high and land on the front wheel being thrown over the bars and landing on my face , chest and knees. I'm a way off this yet!! so far I have rode fast and the jumped off causing me to tumble landing on my knee and continuing over onto my arm shoulder and finally my head. I started slowly and each time I have built up more speed as my faith in the gear built. I have also pulled a wheelie and fell backwards on purpose landing on my back, bum, elbows and head.
The gear has done it's job well with the armour and padding doing it's job in protecting me. I have only been slightly hurt twice 1st time was actually from faulty body armour which has been sorted now and the second time was the last time I went out, about 5 months ago. As I have said I have substituted mx boots for what I have, steel toed boots using 3 layers of thick socks for extra padding. I was always worried that my ankles were vunerable and I was right, luckily they only got bruised and not broken. I have promised myself I wont go out again until I can afford proper boots, gloves and a neck brace. I really want some protection for my groin too!!!! if I ever pluck up the courage to go over the bars I will get hard chest protector to go over leathers too.
My fiancée knows about this fetish and is not very keen (understandably) she came out with me the 1st time I went out on a bike but didn't get out of the car. I have been out a couple of times since without her and I am scared to death incase I get hurt and I can't get help when i'm alone. I wish I could forget about this fetish but I can't. the buzz I get off using the protection for it's intended use really turns me on.
I am not trying to get hurt, I want to feel protected doing something that WITHOUT the gear would almost certainly result in serious injury. The feelings I get when i'm in the gear are intense but when i'm on the bike ready to go it is an equal mix of fear and excitement. I close my visor set off and it's almost a point of no return. then when i'm as fast as I can get and I jump off, it is a point of no return. I have total belief in the protection, I selected it and I know it's designed for far greater speeds if you need it!! the only difference is for me it's there because I DO need it and I DO need it to work.
Should I continue?