Help

[gadget23]

what person?

[rudiebaga2008]

if she thinks its weird and accepts it then why not..if you don't think she accepts it and it would have a negative impact .tell the quack right where to go...its your thing,keep it to yourself and to those who accept it and you

[gadget23]

she doesn't accept it

[rudiebaga2008]

she doesn't accept it

Then tell the therapist no ..where gloves to your next appointment

[sandyd]

I feel like I'm missing some important part of the story here...your therapist is telling you that you need to talk about this in front of your mom, when she already says that she thinks it's weird?

Are you seeing this therapist because you want to? Or is someone forcing you to go?

Glove fetishes are really pretty innocent as far as sexual issues go. It doesn't harm anyone.

You are who you are, and if people don't understand that you like gloves and they go all "ewwwww" on you, then these are people you really shouldn't be hanging around with. Trust me on this: if someone has a problem with anything about you at the beginning of a relationship, it WILL NOT GO AWAY! In fact, it'll only get worse and worse if you stay with them. You cannot say anything to change their mind. You really don't want to lie about it (they will find out!) and you don't want to hide it (they will find out, plus you'll feel crappy and stressed out about it).

Of course, your mom is a special case, but once you're able to be on your own (sounds like you still live with your parents), you can control how much you have to deal with her.

Anyway, I'm not sure I'm helping here...

[gadget23]

Yea I am going to the therapist because I need to and yea he thinks we need to know about this/

[sandyd]

Need to or want to? I think if someone tells you that you "need to" do something is really different than you saying that you "want to". "Need to" is someone judging you for who you are and is really bad. "Want to" is *you* saying you don't like what you're doing and want to figure out what's going on inside yourself.

I know this is really a lot easier for me to say, than for you to actually do, but it's really best to just be 100% open and honest and tell everything like it is. If your therapist is any good at all, he shouldn't be judging you or telling you that you're wrong or perverted or anything like that. He's there to listen and help you come to your own conclusions. He's there to help, not tell you you're bad or anything like that.

And, if your mom is not understanding of your fetish, he should be there to help her understand what it's all about and hopefully, help her understand that judging you badly for this is not doing anyone any good at all and that she needs to be accepting of you for who you are.

Of course, I'm assuming that your mom isn't going to whip you or lock you out of your house because of this. If that's the case, then you probably need to find some sort of abuse hotline to call because you need to be safe first.

[gadget23]

He doesn't think it is wrong he wants me to talk to my mom about it and he will be there and right she won't whip or lock me out but how should I go about telling her what the fetish is and why I like it also, should I tell her about this site?

[sandyd]

Well, I don't know how the moderators feel about it, but I would say just be open and honest about everything.

Maybe it's just that your mom wants to make sure you're not getting involved in something that's criminal or unsafe? It's probably best to be open and try not to hide things because it's the unknown that will make her worry more.

[mrs uni]

Here's my four penneth on the debate or what I have understood of it. Your Mum is making you see a therapist because she struggles with you having a glove fetish?

If anyone needs to see the therapist it's your Mum, not you. Appreciating your child is growing up into an adult and has sexual inclinations must be difficult for any parents to get their head round (in a similar way as it is when you hit adolescence and realise your parents and all adults have sex drives/are sexually active is a complete mind eff). Perhaps she's fixating on the glove thing as it's easier to reject a fetish which isn't massively commonplace than to admit she is scared that her child is becoming an adult, separating from her and has a sex drive.

Don't be made to feel ashamed or co-erced into all but 'confessing' you have your fetish. It isn't a big thing, it's part of you, it's something that works for you that you are entitled to enjoy if you want to. Embrace it as part of your individuality and ultimately its no one's business but yours and whoever you personally want to disclose it to.

Hope that helps. Good luck xx