Is anyone afraid their fetish will prevent them from enjoying vanilla sexuality?

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Thesauce
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Is anyone afraid their fetish will prevent them from enjoying vanilla sexuality?

Post by Thesauce »

As in, men or women suddenly not becoming sexually appealing unless there's gloves (or the other fetishes you might have) involved.

Did any of you suffer from this? Did you recover from it and how?
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Re: Is anyone afraid their fetish will prevent them from enjoying vanilla sexuality?

Post by Ceramic »

yep it happens every now and then.
not much u can do about it,other then talk to ur partner (male\female)

fortunately my wife hasnt completly stopped wearing gloves\other sexy clothing...
having said that - it does happen (from her side,i never ask for it again,got tired of it) once in a long while...like weeks,sometimes months.

but i love her,and we have a wonderful daughter....so not all in life adds up to fetish ;)
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Re: Is anyone afraid their fetish will prevent them from enjoying vanilla sexuality?

Post by tronn206 »

Thesauce wrote: ↑Thu Jun 03, 2021 7:15 pm As in, men or women suddenly not becoming sexually appealing unless there's gloves (or the other fetishes you might have) involved.

Did any of you suffer from this? Did you recover from it and how?
Having rubber gloves involved in a sex session is the icing on the cake for me and I will always be hoping they make an appearance. But I'd never insist or go on about them. And I'm not about to turn down the offer of sex. :lmao:
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Re: Is anyone afraid their fetish will prevent them from enjoying vanilla sexuality?

Post by Blue Cap »

I'm afraid I can't help you there but I can share my personal experience.

I've accepted my glove fetish as a part of my sexual identity.

I used to think gloves are probably just icing on the cake for me. Turns out it's the actual cake and everything else is cream, icing and cherries. Significant effort doing plain ol' vanilla foreplay is needed to arouse myself. I however do enjoy pleasing my partner with vanilla sex as a romantic act but not for my own sexual satisfaction.
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Re: Is anyone afraid their fetish will prevent them from enjoying vanilla sexuality?

Post by rubberglover »

Hmmm. Definitely something I'm thinking about very often. For me "vanilla-like" sexual interactions with others have never been super exciting or something you wanna do again and again. At the beginning I thought it was just missing practice. Or that I found my partners not as attractive as I should to have sex with them. And because everything feels different with another person compared to solo-sex, I believed that it'll get better with time. Well it did sometimes, but more often it did not. I read a lot about asexuality and figured out that being demisexual would suit my personal experiences best. Why? Because when I got romantic feelings for someone, sex felt good. Special. Intimate. And I got horny being with that special person.
But since I discovered more glove-sex, I'd describe myself as glove-sexual. It is definitely a thing. Not "just a fetish" to make sex more interesting. It's something very... basic? I don't know if that's the right word to describe what I mean. A fundamental piece of my sexuality.

Without gloves I'd go for demi. With gloves there's just another dimension. Something I think others enjoy having vanilla sex, but for me it seems not to be a working thing.
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Re: Is anyone afraid their fetish will prevent them from enjoying vanilla sexuality?

Post by tronn206 »

For me rubber/latex gloves, which are my main fetish, don't do much for me unless they are being worn by someone else. I've never really been into wearing them, although I do now and then, when I'm wanking so solo glove masturbation would never be a problem. Also. Even though my fetish for the sight and feel of a rubber gloved hand is so strong I can still enjoy the excitement of vanilla sex.😁
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Re: Is anyone afraid their fetish will prevent them from enjoying vanilla sexuality?

Post by operalove »

Yeah, I think many of us had to deal with this. It caused some problems in my previous relationship. I opened about it with my psychologist and she was trying to help me dissociate the fetish from the vanilla universe. My ex was not at all into any fetish stuff and she was just wearing gloves for me from time to time but it also depends on her mood and when I ask in the wrong time/mood she would get insecure and sometimes argue if I really love and desire her or just using her to fulfill my fetish. It was hard to make her understand that of course I have feelings and desire for her and the gloves are just the extra exciting touch in the relationship. I do get attracted to random gloves on other women but I am definitely more aroused because it is her, because of the whole universe we can share and having HER fulfilling my desires.
The relationship didn't work anyway for other reasons and my current relationship is different now. My girlfriend accepts my fetish completely and understands that it is part of who I am and even when I sometimes mention that maybe I want to get rid of it and be normal vanilla guy, she says that it is non sense, I just need to accept who I am and learn to love everything in each other. We don't share the same fetish but she it always open for kinky things and learned to enjoy our time together, so I don't know if I am worried about my vanilla side anymore since she never rejects me (unless I feel she is not completely in the mood with me, and I want her to be comfortable and not force anything)
So yeah I think I have enough of fetish sex fulfilled that I can also enjoy vanilla time with her :lol2:
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Re: Is anyone afraid their fetish will prevent them from enjoying vanilla sexuality?

Post by tronn206 »

Apart from, quite a few actually, rubber gloved experiences in my teens and early 20s once I got married, to a very vanilla woman, my latex sex life ground to a shuddering halt. Although she knew about my fetish, apart from a few rare occasions, my rubber glove love was resigned to Internet for nearly 19 years.
Now divorced, I realise how much I've missed out on and, once Covid is sorted out, I want to try and make up for lost time. As they say here in the UK. YOLO. (You Only Live Once) lol
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Re: Is anyone afraid their fetish will prevent them from enjoying vanilla sexuality?

Post by operalove »

tronn206 wrote: ↑Wed Dec 01, 2021 9:45 pm Apart from, quite a few actually, rubber gloved experiences in my teens and early 20s once I got married, to a very vanilla woman, my latex sex life ground to a shuddering halt. Although she knew about my fetish, apart from a few rare occasions, my rubber glove love was resigned to Internet for nearly 19 years.
Now divorced, I realise how much I've missed out on and, once Covid is sorted out, I want to try and make up for lost time. As they say here in the UK. YOLO. (You Only Live Once) lol
Yeah too bad the COVID has messed up with many aspects of our life. Before meeting my current girlfriend, I was dealing with those desires inside myself and wanted to share them with someone who maybe just has a fetish in common and no string attached. I started reaching out to groups on fetlife and slowly join meetups, but in the end I didn't feel very comfortable, then COVID happened, then I met my girlfriend.
But yeah, just saying that it is worth exploring. I hope the COVID won't last long and don't miss out anymore, try to meet and connect with people and enjoy your life and passion :whoop:
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Re: Is anyone afraid their fetish will prevent them from enjoying vanilla sexuality?

Post by tronn206 »

operalove wrote: ↑Thu Dec 02, 2021 4:32 pm
tronn206 wrote: ↑Wed Dec 01, 2021 9:45 pm Apart from, quite a few actually, rubber gloved experiences in my teens and early 20s once I got married, to a very vanilla woman, my latex sex life ground to a shuddering halt. Although she knew about my fetish, apart from a few rare occasions, my rubber glove love was resigned to Internet for nearly 19 years.
Now divorced, I realise how much I've missed out on and, once Covid is sorted out, I want to try and make up for lost time. As they say here in the UK. YOLO. (You Only Live Once) lol
Yeah too bad the COVID has messed up with many aspects of our life. Before meeting my current girlfriend, I was dealing with those desires inside myself and wanted to share them with someone who maybe just has a fetish in common and no string attached. I started reaching out to groups on fetlife and slowly join meetups, but in the end I didn't feel very comfortable, then COVID happened, then I met my girlfriend.
But yeah, just saying that it is worth exploring. I hope the COVID won't last long and don't miss out anymore, try to meet and connect with people and enjoy your life and passion :whoop:
Yeah I'm enjoying fetlife at the moment, which I unfortunately joined in the middle of Covid, but it's mainly just talking at the moment, again, because of the pandemic. -_-
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